Fab After 50 and My Life Partner
Some of us have spent the majority of our lives with our life partner. Some of us thought we had a life partner and that turned out to not really be the case. Finding that life partner (love) can become pretty tricky after the age of 50. Heck, finding your life partner is tricky at any age. But, I am here to tell you, it can be done.
My story starts with meeting my high school sweetheart at registration in the 9th grade. We just actually walked past each other, but as they say, “our eyes met”. He took the initiative to ask around about me and the rest was history. Well, not initially. We dated in high school, but broke up because there were rumors around the school that he had got some other girl pregnant, which was kind of believable at the time because I was not having sex with him or at all at that time. So that ended the romance for that moment. That same initiative would show up again later.
Then there was the chance meeting of a young man at Six Flags Magic Mountain on July 4, 1981. He was 19 and I was 16. He then became my obsession (that is a separate post that I will have to write some other time). 🙂 That relationship didn’t develop until some years later and he ultimately became my first husband when I was 23. I felt it deep in my soul that he was my life partner, my forever love, my everything. But, the marriage ended 18 months later due to my perceived notion of cheating and some other life tribulations that were going on. However, he remained my obsession for many years to come.
So then the high school sweetheart comes back in to the picture (initiative). We dated, we married, and we had a son together. Only for it to end 18 years later for various reasons. I once again thought I had my life partner to only be disappointed again.
So what’s the common denominator??? ME!!! I’m now 52 years old, divorced twice and now dating again. The good thing about it is that I now have a much clearer definition of what I want in my life partner. Not only who he needs to be, but what I need to be in the relationship. I’ve now been very clear on what my ‘deal-breakers’ are in a relationship. My favorite thing to say is, “Yeah, I’m not doing that”. I’m choosing not to ignore any red flags if/when they show up (which I have done a bit in the past). I’ve even been told that I am intimidating (no longer the nice, sweet girl) and it is because my communication is very clear on what my expectations are. And I am not wavering even a bit. As a result, I was a little worried that I wouldn’t find the one for me. I knew I would have to kiss a few frogs along the way, but I was determined to find him.
I am a hopeless romantic and want to (and dare I say, need to) be in a relationship. That is where I feel I am at my best, when love is reciprocated both ways. I say all this to say that I have met an amazing man who has completely changed my thinking about men and relationships. There are some absolute gentlemen out there who really want to be in a relationship and who are willing to do what it takes to make it work. I just recently told him that it has been (only) 4 months and we haven’t even run in to a ‘bump in the road yet’. I know that a disagreement or misunderstanding is quite possible for us at some point, but we have already established that we are in this for the long haul and willing to work through whatever it is. By his on admission, he doesn’t do the gray area so will always talk about something if it is bothering him. I love it!!! It has been an amazing ride thus far and I’m looking forward to what the future may hold. I may actually have found my life partner.
It is possible to find a life partner (love) after age 50 and I am going to continue enjoying this fabulous chapter of my life. If you are struggling to find your life partner (love), don’t give up!! It’s out there for you.